Hey, everybody!

As we all know, Detroit is one of the few cities in the world that has no real rapid transit system, and so we're all pretty much forced to drive everywhere.

What I'd like to do is start a discussion about this, but I want to do it in that special, Detroit-is-different way.

Basically, I'd like to ask a facetious question, and then spend several days defending the status quo. Here's how I propose to do it:

• Whenever anybody posts statistics, I'd like to ignore them and offer my "conventional wisdom."

• Whenever anybody compares Detroit to any other city, I'll maintain that Detroit is different and so those comparisons mean nothing.

• Whenever somebody offers strong evidence that the world is changing and leaving behind the era in which everybody drives their own personal car, I'll just maintain that, "People love their cars," and pretend the debate ends there.

Despite any mild questioning of the status quo I may do, underneath it all, you can be sure I regard every other mode of transportation as simply an earlier stage of development leading up to the era of the personal vehicle, which is the pinnacle of human development never to be surpassed.

In this way, I hope to draw out people who feel differently from the way I do and waste their time as they try to point out the obvious.

What do you think, everybody? Do we have too many freeways and not enough mass transit?

Because I think everything is hunky-dory the way it is and anybody who disagrees with me is an un-American commie.