I think the real issue here is getting the young lady to stop listening to her heart.

She thinks things might just work out, that he is confused or that she might have forced him to leave through some unknown action. Maybe she isn't as fisky as he'd like, or she might not fit into the old wedding dress ... the mind can play all sorts of tricks in trying to rationale the irrational.

The issue is to try and get her to see the truth. That is a tough nut.

We don't know how close exdetroiter is with this lady. What kind of influence he might have. I fear if he tells her, " I chatted with an on-line forum with a bunch of strangers about your situation, and they said..." he's likely to get a frying pan to the forehead.

My advice is to stay out of other familys' issues. At most, try to encourage her to seek advice from someone she trusts. Beyond that ... its dangerland.