Detroit: Fight or Flight

**sumas** · August-20-13, 03:16 AM

Guess I am always apologizing, sorry burbs and transplants. Everyone needs to make life decisions.

Just do not understand why you bother with this forum. You left, get on, get over it.

**Honky Tonk** · August-20-13, 04:37 AM

Originally Posted by sumas

First I am all Detroit. Second we had ten assaults on our eastside home so don't whine. Third we did leave the city because of school concerns. Fouth, our kids grew up and I couldn't wait to get back.

We have had some weird problems since being back for 10 years but beats the hell out of the burbs with their narrow and racist attitudes.

You're right about one thing though, you do live in a wonderful neighborhood. 10 assaults, imagine that! You have me beat.

**noise** · August-20-13, 06:56 AM

Originally Posted by Honky Tonk

You're right about one thing though, you do live in a wonderful neighborhood. 10 assaults, imagine that! You have me beat.

If you have the means and don't leave after 10 assaults, it's not that you're not giving up on Detroit, it's that you have given up on yourself and your family.

**Zacha341** · August-20-13, 07:31 AM

I like aspects Detroit life and suburban life [[depending on the suburb as they are not all the same) as I deal with both almost daily for decades.

I have roots here but I could leave and be ok too. I don't want to be too far however. I'm too much of a city person to do rural -- need to know there's a dollar store not too far away!

More people will be comfortable to stay and truly invest in our neighborhoods when crime is addressed.

Originally Posted by sumas

First I am all Detroit. Second we had ten assaults on our eastside home so don't whine. Third we did leave the city because of school concerns. Fouth, our kids grew up and I couldn't wait to get back.

We have had some weird problems since being back for 10 years but beats the hell out of the burbs with their narrow and racist attitudes.

**4V4DMD** · August-20-13, 10:21 AM

Detroit is a dynamic place and not for everyone. If your life and well being feels to be in jeopardy then please move out. I tell that to my GF. If she ever feels unsafe, then we'll leave.

If you stay and overcome the challenges, prevent the problems and grow the connections, then stay and yeah maybe your pride will rise. But you don't need to put down others, as those who've left don't need to call you an idiot.

Detroit fight or flight has been the conundrum for many people and years.

**rex** · August-20-13, 03:32 PM

well sumas. When people direct their narrow racist attitude toward you the best thing you can do is remind yourself they're the one with the problem, not you, and then laugh. Why? because its hysterical and it will piss them off. Maybe you lived in the wrong suburb.
Small minded people making a fool of themselves > 10 assaults on your home, some wierd stuff, and drug peddling neighbors.
1 you can disregard. The other not so much

**sumas** · August-20-13, 04:40 PM

Look I focus on this is Detroit Yes. But I have my stories too

We walked from our house in 1989 or 90 after 10 years. It was some scary crap that happened in one year alone. We lived close to Denby. The buy out money [[by our city) given to everyone to move so Chrysler could build a plant was our area death Nell. Thanks Realtors.

The things that happened to us in just one year were utterly bizarre, so bizarre our mortgage holder let us just leave, gave a beautiful home back.We wrote a petition that their board approved.

**sumas** · August-20-13, 05:15 PM

I am going back to Detroit Yes concept. Lived in EEV for 7 maybe 8 yrs. Great community.

My Mom needed help staying in her home. She wanted to die there and did.

We live and own in Islandview Village now.

My stance... FIGHT

**Ben** · August-20-13, 06:53 PM

When you have children/grandchildren it is a totally different situation. I raised my kids in Harper Woods [[They went to St. Peter and Bishop Gallagher). My youngest graduated in 1992, I sold in 1994 and moved to Grosse Pointe Woods. I didn't want to live somewhere where I worried about my future grandkids not being able to go for bike rides or walks without me worrying. In fact that is the main reason my parents moved from Detroit in the 50's and moved to Harper Woods. Sometimes the idea of fighting is nice but when you have kids and grandkids you just don't want to take a chance.

**Lily** · August-20-13, 08:47 PM

Originally Posted by sumas

Guess I am always apologizing, sorry burbs and transplants. Everyone needs to make life decisions.

Just do not understand why you bother with this forum. You left, get on, get over it.

I "bother" because I thought this was a public forum and I do care about Detroit.

**sumas** · August-20-13, 11:05 PM

Apologies again folk, I am crabby these days. I understand the grand kid thing although I have none. My backyard is big. Kids that visit are safe. I was a helicopter mom and can't change.

I see the pluses and negatives in my community. Crap, the ice cream man sells dope.

I came back to my city because I want to make a difference. I think we do.

I am not remotely naive about my community. I generally, but have on occasion, do not post negativity. Hate to feed the trolls.

I am just a city person. We enjoy our prairie. Our neighbors fabulous.

**EASTSIDE CAT 67-83** · August-21-13, 06:53 AM

Sumas
I have great respect for you and your attitude towards your neighborhood and the city, and I believe you really have made a difference via the stellar historical publishing work you have provided for us all to enjoy. I know the area you call home intimately, my parents both grew up in that neighborhood back in the 40 and 50's. They went to school at Annunciation and then raised their family [[me and my siblings) just a few minutes to the east of there in the Jeff/Chalmers area. All that being said unfortunately every single one of my extended family [[12 individuals) have been victims of crime both property and physical violence over the past 20 years. I have several family members who are or were DFD/DPD employees who give/gave their all to the city. Our single remaining relatives who live in the city [[EEV) are finally moving out next month to SCS. It simply came down to a quality of life issue, forget the city services, home and auto insurance break you get when you leave. Its really a matter of simple math and statistics, eventually crime will touch you in the COD. For me its a love hate relationship, I LOVE the city but hate what its become. I was just on Belle Isle this past weekend at the Conservatory taking my daughters for their first visit, there is so much culture and history within the city limits... I guess its just like the motto says "We hope for better things; it will rise from the ashes"....but when and how long, I'm thinking another 50-75 years. I wish you the best of luck and happiness in your little community.
ESC

**Honky Tonk** · August-21-13, 06:57 AM

Originally Posted by Lily

I "bother" because I thought this was a public forum and I do care about Detroit.

I, for one, appreciate your honest posts and insites into the realities of actually living in Detroit. Too many times people post idealistic "feel good", stories bordering on the edge of fiction, about living here. Not everyone is privy to life in a golden, gated tower. Some of us @ ground level have to deal with the harsher realities. This is an open forum, and you have as much right as the next person to post your viewpoints.

**michimoby** · August-21-13, 07:24 AM

Originally Posted by Honky Tonk

I, for one, appreciate your honest posts and insites into the realities of actually living in Detroit. Too many times people post idealistic "feel good", stories bordering on the edge of fiction, about living here. Not everyone is privy to life in a golden, gated tower. Some of us @ ground level have to deal with the harsher realities. This is an open forum, and you have as much right as the next person to post your viewpoints.

I think this sums up why I continue to peruse these forums even though I left the city a few months ago. For one, I think this is an incredible platform for dialogue to occur in a safe, non-judgmental environment; there's not many other places in Detroit where that can occur.

But I think there's a very solid contingent of newcomers to Detroit that have this naievete about the city and its challenges. I should know; I was one of those folks that overlooked the gross inefficiencies in the city and got defensive whenever they were brought up. But by addressing the challenges the city faces - first by making them known, and then constructively discussing them - is something that a some new residents [[esp. those in their 20s) don't understand or don't have an interest in doing.

The more I can contribute to, and learn from, this discussion, sort of as a post-mortem of my time in Detroit, the more I can help others become reasoned advocates for the city.

**antongast** · August-21-13, 10:33 AM

Originally Posted by michimoby

For one, I think this is an incredible platform for dialogue to occur in a safe, non-judgmental environment; there's not many other places in Detroit where that can occur.

Originally Posted by michimoby

But by addressing the challenges the city faces - first by making them known, and then constructively discussing them - is something that a some new residents [[esp. those in their 20s) don't understand or don't have an interest in doing.

I see you've managed to cast off the shackles of excessive self-awareness, anyway.

**sumas** · August-21-13, 11:36 AM

Thank you Eastside, what a gracious post. Crime happens everywhere,

My Mom, an eastside resident her whole life never had anything bad happen.

On reflection, I am wrong. She was delivering groceries to a church member on Woodhall by Finney and was jacked for her purse. Her foot got broken cause they dragged her off the porch. Sigh! She was 82 at the time.

**Gistok** · August-21-13, 01:05 PM

Originally Posted by belleislerunner

Quitters are always going to make excuses.

Some people are optimists/realists and fight to make things better even if they're the last home standing on a block.

Others are fair weather fans looking to "turn a profit" after a few years and when things get tough, throw in the towel and bail.

Adversity reveals your true character. Or lack thereof.

Character?? If you live in the last house standing on the block then its a safe bet you're judgement is clouded about your own safety, likely due to suffering from dimentia, rather than it being a sign of character...

**Honky Tonk** · August-21-13, 01:43 PM

Originally Posted by Gistok

Character?? If you live in the last house standing on the block then its a safe bet you're judgement is clouded about your own safety, likely due to suffering from dimentia, rather than it being a sign of character...

Or lack of oxygen from running......

**Chinman** · August-22-13, 03:44 AM

Must say...I stopped reading after the 1st paragraph with this statement, “Live here for five or six years, sell it at a profit, and move up in the world,” I thought in 2001.
Learned years ago that you should not buy your primary residence as a money-maker. you should buy based on livability and schools for your kids.